Learning Not To Be The Last Person On My List

I spend a lot of time taking care of everyone else. Making sure the kids are happy. Making sure the house keeps running. Making sure everything feels safe and full of love for the people who need me.

Somewhere in the middle of all of that, I forget that I need looking after too.

It is so easy to put myself last. To think I will rest later. I will drink the hot cup of tea later. I will take a moment when everything else is done. The trouble is everything else is never done.

There have been days when I realise that I have not done a single thing for myself. Days where I do not sit down until the kids are in bed. Days where I look in the mirror and think I do not even recognise the tired person looking back.

I am learning that I cannot pour from an empty cup. I am learning that my needs are not less important just because I am a mum. I am learning that taking ten minutes to breathe or read or sit outside does not make me selfish. It makes me stronger.

The kids learn how to treat themselves by watching how I treat myself. I want them to grow up knowing their happiness matters. Their comfort matters. Their joy matters. So mine has to matter too.

I will still have days where I forget. I will still have times where chaos comes first. But I am trying. I am trying to listen to my own needs without guilt. I am trying to remind myself that I deserve care and kindness too.

This is me learning to put myself on the list. Not at the bottom. Not when everyone else is sorted. Right there with the rest of the people I love.